The Chaos in Christmas

 

I love Christmas time. The temperatures, the lights, the smells (oh.... the smells), the tree and even the family gatherings. I love the simplicity of the season. Yes! The simplicity. I know and have met so many people who complain. They are so exhausted mentally, emotionally, physically, financially and spiritually. Why? The Christmas season!!! I've never understood this.

Christmas was never meant to exhaust us in any way. It was never meant to make us stress; especially about finances.

We spend so much time trying to figure out who and what to buy for whom. We're out-doing what we bought last year. For some, it's out-doing the other side of the family, In-laws and the other parents. Fighting parking lots, patrons in stores and long check out lines. We then worry about our overdrawn bank accounts, drained savings and maxed out credit cards. Now, how does this contribute to the reason for the season? You're right! It doesn’t!! Not even in the slightest!

Anything that causes us stress, chaos and discontentment is not of God. It is not of anything godly. Satan works hard. He works very hard to rear his ugly face in any and all aspects of life. Every stinking day of the year. He is not confined to a certain time of year. He is not confined to a certain season. That's right.... He will in any way he can distract you from the true meaning of the season. This is when we lose focus. This is when we STRESS OUT!

But...... Let me tell you! It does not have to be this way!!!!!!!

Christmas is not about the presents. It's about the Presence! The presence of family. The presence of Love and most importantly the presence of GOD!!

I challenge you today, tomorrow and all Christmas Season. Stay focused on the reason for the season. The birth of Christ... As in Isaiah 9:6

“For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.”

(image borrowed)

Here are a few ways to help with teaching our children and ourselves (including me):

Teach our children why we celebrate the season as in Isaiah....

• Buy less..... My children will get one gift and stocking suffers. And, these are purchased at the after Christmas sales. (yes, I'm that Mom!!).
• Don't be afraid to give hand crafted heart felt gifts. (People love them)
• Make a bigger deal out of their birthdays
• Take the focus off the giving of gifts. Give to others. (make a Christmas meal & deleiver to a family who may not have Christmas dinner without it)
• 
  
• Volunteer on Christmas morning. (Salvation Army, Jesus House, Homeless Shelters, Soup Kitchens)
•  
• Use the money to purchase and pass out coats, gloves, scarfs, shoes, sandwiches, soups to the homeless. 

I pray this will help you as much as it helped me while writing it. Christmas is a wonderful spiritual time of year. That all started with the birth of a baby. Who was born to die. To suffer and die for our salvation.

Blessings,

Hollie Kate

 

 

 

 

Over Shooting The Target?

We have a dog. A big slobbering fur shedding hundred and forty pound teddy bear. We love this dog. Well....he does not know he is a dog. He is part of the Hendrickson family. And, he knows it. He is our brat! He is so smart. He is very protective. He a cuddling game playing sweet dog. With all this we get the fur. This dog sheds enough to knit a nice XL sweater on a daily basis. This is even when brushing him daily.

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=10204666218648415&set=vb.1624173453&type=3&theater
(spike at this finest with the girls)

I wear a lot of black. Not sure this an intelligent move when you have a dog with a monstrous shedding issue and a cat.  Well let's face it. I am not a twig. And black, well it slims us, right?! So, I live in black and I had taken these perfect freshly washed and dried unwrinkled slacks and laid them lovingly on my bed. I go above and beyond to make sure my slacks do NOT have dog hair on them when I leave. I want to... Okay, I am OCD and I NEED to make sure they are free of dog hair. Of course and of anything else displeasing to the eyes or stomach. I would literally climb a mountain or swim an ocean (and I HATE water/swimming) to avoid this dog hair (but, I love this dog).

 

(Kielee & Spike) 

Anyway, I this particular morning I went through a lot to ensure hair free slacks. I was so focused on these hair free slack. I had showered, blow dried my hair. Applied my make-up. And, was standing in my room in my undergarments. Ready to take on the day ahead. You know it was one of those days. Where you are ready to face and take on the world. Because, You know this nice clean outfit that looks so good on you and makes you feel pretty darn amazing.  Yep, I am about to put it on!!!  I excitedly glanced over at these nice clean wrinkle-free hair-free slacks. Okay, things like this make me happy. Yes, I am aware I may be in need of some kind of medication. But, since that has not been diagnosed. I mean than anyone, only web MD. I'll continue to be excited about clean clothes and a clean house.  Well as I was basking in the happiness of the hair free slacks. I attempted, yes attempted to apply lotion to my lizard legs. That special kind of lizard legs, that only comes with the wonderful season we call winter. As I gently pushed down on my favorite bottle of lotion. The lotion came shooting out of the nozzle, like a bullet form a 357 magnum. It overshot my hand and over my shoulder and would you know it...... Onto the freshly cleaned, hair free slacks. Not just a normal small amount. But, enough to lotion a small child. UGH!!!!!! I was not the slightest bit pleased. I was so focused. I was so intently careful to make sure these slacks were perfect. And, in this split second they were trashed. Dirty and un-wearable. Still without dog hair.

Sometimes we hear people say "I knew at that moment God was speaking to me." Well, Seriously at that moment I KNEW!  There are so many times I have been so focused on that thing over there! Whatever that thing may be. I was so intently focused on those dog hair-free slacks laying over there. That I had missed the mark right in front of me. How many times have we missed the mark directly in front of us. How many times what that mark important. How many times if we had just focused on that mark we could have prevented the mess ahead.  More times than I can count on my fingers and toes. Okay, if were being honest I might count the hair on my head, too!

 

(Yes, this was me this morning)

I felt God telling me.... STOP obsessing on that over there. On the things up head. If you don't want to be messy then focus on the task in front of you. Because sometimes there will be slacks that are not dog-hair-free. And, that is okay. Just focus on what I have placed directly in front of you today. Focus on who I have placed in front of you today. And, tomorrow and the next day and the next day focus on that task. That person. And, watch how messes can be prevented. And, because God loves us. That is what he does. In Isaiah 45:2 he tells us this "This is what the LORD says: "I will go before you,  and level the mountains. I will smash down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron." We need not worry. That is what he does. Instead do as instructed in Philippians 4:6  "Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done." 

So, I challenge you what I have challenged myself. To stop. To focus. To intently give all I've have to the task in front of me. The person in front of me. Because, at that moment that is what is important. And, do you know how to know each one of those moments are the most important moments. Are you breathing?  If you are reading this I am sure you are! Then, that is what makes it important. Everything we choose to do. Every minute throughout our life. We are exchanging a moment in time for. Focus on the moment. The right here right now moment. And, find the joy in each one. I vow to not miss another moment and to see the joy in the moment. The gift of the moment, the task or the person.

Mandisa: "Born For This (ESTHER)" - Official Lyric Video

Feels like I've been holding my breath, trying to still my restless heart
Everything hangs on my next step, finding my nerve, playing my part
I found shelter underneath His crown, found favor inside His eyes
Rock this boat, and I just might drown, honesty seems to come with a price
There's a time to hold your tongue, time to keep your head down
There's a time but it's not now

Sometimes you gotta go, uninvited
Sometimes you gotta speak when you don't have the floor
Sometimes you gotta move, when everybody else says you should stay
No way, no, not today
You gotta ask, if you want an answer
Sometimes you gotta stand apart from the crowd
Long before your heart could run the risk
You were born for this
You were born for this

I'm leaning on the ones before me, my father's father's dreams
I'm standing on the top of their shoulders calling the One delivering me
There's a time to hold your tongue, time to keep your head down
There's a time but it's not now

Sometimes you gotta go, uninvited
Sometimes you gotta speak when you don't have the floor
Sometimes you gotta move, when everybody else says you should stay
No way, no, not today
You gotta ask, if you want an answer
Sometimes you gotta stand apart from the crowd
Long before your heart could run the risk
You were born for this
You were born for this

One step, one move.
Born to trust You.
Made to lay my
Life before You

Sometimes you gotta go, uninvited
Sometimes you gotta speak when you don't have the floor
Sometimes you gotta move, when everybody else says you should stay
No way, no, not today
You gotta ask, if you want an answer
Sometimes you gotta stand apart from the crowd
Long before your heart could run the risk
You were born for this!

Child Centerd Home VS. Christ Centered home. (long but worth it)

I think as parents we all struggle with parenting for one reason or another. We want to do the right thing. Be the best parent and avoid any mistakes. We want to feed them the right things. We worry about helicopter parenting. We worry we don't helicopter enough. If we are unable to make it to this game or school function. We worry we are unable to participate in one thing or another. We worry they will be picked on. We don't want them to conform to the world. But, we want them to "fit it". We want them to be accepted and avoid them being hurt at all cost. I am not just talking about being hurt physically, mentally, emotionally or even sexually.

Bottom line...... Parenting is hard. Especially single parenting. I am not talking I need a couple of hours extra sleep. One tear on my cheek hard. But, I am talking about hiding in closet bawling like a baby I need to sleep the weekend, hiding behind the couch stuffing a candy  bar in my face kind of hard. If anyone says parenting is not hard, they must have nanny's, chefs and unlimited funds (true story).

It is time to expose myself......... As a single parenting since 2005 (I did remarry and divorce again since then, another story for another day).  I have struggled in one manner or another, on a regular basis. I had two boys in football at the same time. We ended up at practice 5 nights a week (at times) and games three days a week. Working two jobs and attending college makes it challenging to attend everything I needed to attend. We are not counting the two girls in vocal programs; or the one in daycare I had.  It is HARD!!!!! Till this day it aggravates me to not end when someone says "why did you have five kids being single".  Immediately the holy spirit abandons ship and I want to throat punch someone. If in a million years I ever thought I'd be divorced, I would have brought them into the world. Duh..... What kind of person makes a statement like that to a parent, single or not.

I didn't want my children to be "unstable" or hurt so I also had them in counseling four of the five in counseling every week, was also added to my schedule. Along with the youngest with severe allergies at the time and had to get allergy shots every week. Believe me! I am not complaining, only explaining to give you a visual.

So, my schedule was crazy hectic to say the least. Well, I have learned through a lot of parenting mistakes. Through trial and error. Through blood, sweat and tears. We are not perfect and will never be. To expect it from yourself or another is ridiculous.  Parenting in general is a messy, emotional. crazy, hectic, beautiful roller coaster of a ride.

At times I was sad, jealous and mad. I felt cheated, wronged and abandoned. By family. By my ex who promised our differences that caused the divorce wouldn't make the children "suffer" through it. I wanted my babies to have it all. The perfect mom. The nice house. The nice car. The extracurricular activities. I wanted the best clothes (name brand of course). I had seen all the other single mom's at the events and school activities have these things. I would be angry with my children's father because of the lack of child support. And, I would go home. Fix my children the newest concoction that I created from whatever ingredients I could find in the cupboard.  Then I would bathe them, place the newest thrift store finds on their little bodies and tuck them in bed. Then I would go to my room with my youngest who has always slept with me. And, cry till I couldn't see straight. I did this for several years.

See I attended church. I volunteered every Sunday, for two hours. Then I would attend Sunday school and worship service. I never felt accepted, wanted or care about. It was hard. And, who suffered the most. Not me, not my ex.... but it was my children. See, when we place our eyes on attaining the material possessions for our children we will fail one hundred percent of the time. It took me a long time to realize this. Way to long. And, in the process of trying to attain the goals of material things I lost a few pretty important things.

1. I was so caught up in being the perfect parent. I failed to attain a relationship with the perfect God. therefore I lost myself. I lost myself in the midst of trying to give it all to my children.

My home had become a child centered home, instead of the Christ centered home. EPIC FAIL!!!

2. My second oldest son. He refuses to talk to me. He moved to his dad's and will not see me, period.

Also, my home had become  a child centered home, instead of the Christ centered home.  Again, EPIC FAIL!!!

3. I had focused so much on making my home a child centered home. I had failed to think about what will I do when my children a raised and gone.  I never focused on a relationship of my own. Not with Christ or a future mate.

In the midst of it all I focused so much on children. I had lost sight of the real goal. Don't get me wrong. Our job is to love our children. Give them roots and then wings. But, we try to giving it all. Giving it all to them is NOT our job. When we do we create monsters, Seriously!!!!

I would read books upon books on Christian parenting. I would enforce what I had learned for a brief time. Then when trying to enforce it had gotten to hard. I'd go back to what I felt was best. Not what God knew was best. The biggest EPIC PARENTING FAIL, of all.
To focus on our children without focusing on God first is our biggest parenting mistake of all. Our children suffer. We suffer and then their children suffer. A vicious cycle of Epic Parenting Fails. And, to know I created it, is the biggest heartbreak of all. I love my children to much.
We want the best for them. So, we give them the name brand clothes. We give them the smart phones. We give them the television in their rooms. We give them the computers, cars and trips to the movies and malls. See the pattern..... WE GIVE, WE GIVE,  WE GIVE! 

What have we asked them to give? What responsibilities have we asked of them? Any at all?

I still have two daughters living in my home at this point. And, I love all five of my children so much it hurts. Seriously till it hurts. However, I've learned a huge lesson in the first twenty years of parenting. And, I have promised to God to have a Christ centered home and not a child centered home.

See, even the state only requires us to give them a roof over their heads, meals, clothes and love.
The computers, televisions, phones, trips to the movies, malls etc..... they are all privileges. Things you earn. YES!! I said the one thing all children dread hearing EARN!!!! You want theses privileges you must pay or work to earn at least half of the cost. You loss the privileges then it is the child's responsibility to earn it back. The length of time is up to them.

Failing grades: loss of all privileges! Failure to do chores: loss of all privileges! Lying/disrespecting another: Loss of all privileges! Must sound harsh. That's okay. My home has become a Christ Centered Home. No longer a child centered home. And, that is the way it will remain. The bible says:
Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6. God's promise is however we train them (Good or Bad) they will not depart. Therefore, it is our job not to give it all. I do not want my children to be trained with the spirit of entitlement.

So, I challenge you today. If you have created a Child Centered Home, to create a Christ Centered Home. Keep a journal note the changes you see in your home, in your children and in yourself.
Keep on keeping on for God's glorious Kingdom you will eventually call home.

Remember all Good things are from heaven above. That is how I know coffee is heaven sent ;)

Praying someone out there is blessed by today's blog.
Hollie Kate

The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother. Proverbs 29:15

You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. Det 6:7

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate. Psalm 127:3-5

But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:14-17

Free Sessions, nominate someone today......

We all pray and ask God to use us. Well, at least I know I do. I have a passion. A passion for the lost, lonely and hurting. I know God has called me to do more. I've asked God to show me how can I do more. I am not an actress. I am not a musician. I can barley whistle. I am not a singer. Unless I'm stuck in traffic or in the shower. Then I think we all become singers. I do not have money. I am a single mom on a very tight budget (but, we make it). I know and believe God give us all talents. Some we never admit we have.  Well, I have this desire to be used. I've prayed about it. Out of this desire and payers was born my new adventure. The Ruth  project. I am on a mission. A mission laid on my heart by God.

Red Dirt and Diamonds Photography by Hollie Kate will be taking nominations. These nominations will receive a 3 hour photo session, a CD with a minimum of 15 photographs and print release. And, 10x13 canvas print.

Please visit https://www.facebook.com/Hollie.Kate.Photography and message me your nominees. Tell me their story. They can be any ages, race, religion., or background. I will be giving away to sessions a month until December. Then in December I will be changing it up...... Details TBA.

So, please click the link, like the page and nominate someone you care about today.

 .

No Weapons Allowed.......

Have you ever seen this sign at a school before: Well, just disregard it!!!!!!!!!!

 Because weapons are exactly what your child needs!

The weapons given to us through Gods word.





 “Take…the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.” (Eph. 6:17-18) When Paul talks about the Armor of God in Ephesians 6, he mentions two offensive weapons that every believer is to equip himself with:

1. Gods Word
2. Prayer

 We need to equip our children with these weapons. And one of the best, most practical ways to do this is by praying God’s Word over your child.

We can help our children in these areas. But, first we have to be able to apply it ourselves. There is so much power in simply praying the word of God. When praying use the word.

We can take every opportunity to use scripture and prayer in everyday life to help not only them, but us as well. I have started taking scriptures and posting them in obvious places (bathroom mirror, chalkboard, fridge, doors, etc.). Giving them a scripture a week to memorize. Beginning with easy ones. And, ones that apply to current situations/circumstances. Well......

This morning taking Kielee to school I had the perfect opportunity to do this. Kielee is easily fearful and anxious. She has a fear of being forgotten or left (bus stop, school, etc.) No, I've not ever forgotten her. She was in tears worrying me and wanting me to promise Madison would meet her at the bus stop. As a mom. Well just a human with morals. I do not make promises I am unable to keep. So, quickly said a quiet prayer. For direction and guidance, on what I should say/do. That still small voice said "here is your chance, don't pass it up". No, it was not an audible voice. But, that inner voice of the holy spirit.  After taking a deep breath, I said "Kielee, (paraphrasing here) you can spend all day worrying about something that may not happen. And, not enjoy the day. Or we can pray together, and enjoy your day. It's up to you. Of course like a smart girl, she says "Let's pray about it".  So, right there in the drop off line we did it . I grabbed her hands. Together we bowed our heads and I said it out loud, windows rolled down. For the world to see and hear.

Heavenly Father,
I want to thank you for the Kielee. I want to thank your for entrusting me with her. This precious sweet little girl you lent to me for a brief time. I know each one of my children has been given as a gift and my job is to equip them for battle (spiritual battle).Your word  in Isaiah 54:14 says  "No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper ".I pray anything the enemy has set up against Kielee will not prosper. For you knitted her together (Psalm 139:13). And I know you have plans for each one. Your word says you have plans for hope and a future and we claim this, (Jeremiah 29:11). I pray right now and ask you give Kielee a spirit of peace. Peace in a way only you can. A peace that passes all understanding  (John 14:27).  Lord please help to cast all her anxiety to you (1Peter 5:7). For we know, you go before her and make her crooked path straight (Isaiah 45:2).  Lord help her to trust in you (Proverbs 3:5). Please help her to understand , you have not given us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of love and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7). As, she embarks on the day ahead help her to meditate on the things in Philippians 4:8. In Jesus name, Amen.

Nothing eloquent, simple fast and effective. After this she jumped out and ran right in. I didn't even have to get out. She was prayed over and with. Now, she is armed and ready for her day ahead.

So there is a place for weapons (spiritual) in school. If we are not equipping them with the weapons to fight the "unseen" battle, then who will!?  I pray over her teachers, principal, administrators, custodians, clerical staff, etc......  If you school allows arrange a prayer walk around their school. Pray in the hall ways, class rooms, play ground, offices, library. Anywhere the district allows pray there. Anoint the doorways with oil. Do whatever you have to. I promise it will make a difference. Even, if it's not a difference you can see.

Thank you for stopping by and reading,
Remember God is good,  and coffee is your friend :)

Hollie Kate

 

 

 

 

 

A prayer for my children as they go into school today

A prayer for my children as they go into school today

 

"Father I thank You for my children, You have heaped me with bounty and I praise You for entrusting me with them. For the ones who have already started. The ones who start today and the one who will start next week.  They are fearfully and wonderfully made. You chose them for me and I thank You for the gift they are to me. Please bless them and ask that You fill each of them with “Whatever things are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, having virtue,
or anything praiseworthy, let them think on these things.”

I pray Lord that my children speak life, love and your glory into all situations, you have given us instruction how we are to speak, and the power of the tongue to do damage, but also to bring healing. “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit" (Proverbs 18:21).
I pray godly teachers, custodians, principals and administrators are placed in their lives. Ones of integrity. Ones who will be uplifting, understanding and compassionate. I pray my children will offer these traits to others as well.

"As I pray of my daughters, Lord, I ask for purity in their lives and that of their friends. I ask for protection over their innocence and purity; protect them from others and wrong choices, call them to a higher standard. I ask for wisdom and discernment in teaching and preparing them for a life of purity and modesty. I also ask that you grant her friends parents wisdom as they raise a girls of integrity."

Lord, as I pray for my sons against pornography and lust and its evil effects on his life both as a child and as an adult. Give me wisdom in teaching him to respect girls and women. Put a calling of purity upon their lives that they will never use, abuse, or take advantage of girls or women. I ask for wisdom and discernment in teaching and preparing them for a life of purity." Lord, help me in a way only you can.

I ask for you to protect them and their walk with you. That you grace them with courage and boldness. As, the bow their heads and hearts when praying a blessing at breakfast and lunch. That you protect them as they strive to be a witness for you. Because, I know they may be the only Jesus they encounter.

I ask Father that you would fill my sons and daughters lives with good relationships, first with you Lord. Help them to seek after Godly things. I ask for your blessing on my relationship with them, help me to express to them and for them to feel unconditional love; may they rise up and call me blessed, as a glory to you. I ask for good friends for them; that they may feel accepted and influenced by good kids. Keep her path straight. I ask your blessing on their lives by causing Godly people to positively influence their lives at the crossroads they will face. Go before them and prepare the way."

Above all, I pray that my kids will develop strong relationships with the Lord. I also pray for healthy relationships with their siblings, with friends, and with their teachers and myself as their mother. The world is a dangerous place in many ways. I pray for physical, spiritual and emotional protection and healing for each child. Lord, please protect them from what satan means for harm, and please let them see, your glory.

Thank you for you multitude of blessings in my life. I pray these things in you precious name. AMEN

Decorating on a budget in progress

 

As you all know.... I am a single mom. It's never been a secret I do not get child support. Therefore, I work on a very tight budget. I love decorating. I love re-decorating. I love refurbishing. Making old look new and improved. I like the shabby chic/Euro cottage look. I am currently living in a 100 year old 2 bed room, 1 bath 789 square foot home. This home means a lot to me. It has been in my family as long as I can remember. I've shared a lot of memories with my cousins, siblings and great grandmother here. I just love this house. It does need a HUGE amount of work.

 

In the kitchen it really needs work. However, my grandfather and his brother built the cabinets. The layout is defiantly one that was designed a hundred years ago. I am sure the cabinets were built before I was born. Therefore, these cabinets mean so much to me. I've already started decorating. There is a lot to do. Remember when looking at these pictures. This a work in progress. I will be repainting a few of the rooms.

 

 



This table I bought off of Craigslist for $25.

The frames were bought at various thrift stores and garage sales

for no more than .50 cents each. The items in the frames were gifts from my children and/or bought for around .10-.25 cents at garage sales.

The desk was a hand me down from my aunt. The chairs were

left in a rent house of my grandmother's. Frames were painted with various spray paints purchased at the family dollar.

These are the cabinets built by my grandfather.

Everything you see décor wise, was also purchased at garage sales.

Including the canisters, $2.00 bucks. Yes, I love the school bus yellow paint :)

 Rugs $1.00 each. Basket on top of the fridge for snacks

$2.00 garage sale. The plates and plate holder, bought at various

garage sales for less than $1.00 each. The antique cabinet between the fridge and stove

my big spend at $15.00.

Chalk board paint borrowed. The frame less than a buck

then spray painted with left over spray paint.

 lef

This cabinet obviously was not a built in. I just painted it to

match the paint of the other cabinets,

 

 

This was the view from the front door walking in. Since this picture was taken, I've

received a hand me down brown leather couch. I've also added an area rug. I am also painting the

entertainment a shabby chic turquoise.

 

These are just a few of my projects in progress. I will be adding paint on the walls. I am sharing these in hopes it may help someone else on a very limited budget know, it does not take a lot of money to have a nice home. If you have any ideas or suggestions to help me. I will take them. So, feel free to share.

My home, Am I doing it all wrong?

Commit to the LORD whatever you do,
and your plans will succeed.
Proverbs 16:3

When we are little girls we all dream of the “perfect” life we will one day have. I think, especially if we didn't have that “perfect” life a child. We say when I grow up "I won't do that" & "I won't let that happen". I will be the perfect mom with the perfect house. Well, when we grow-up we all soon discover this is certainly an unattainable goal. I am sure over the years, God has watched me attempt this feat, he has laughed out loud; while shaking his head.

There so many days as a mom I get distracted by the chaos of life. The full time job, attempting to run a part-time photography business, keeping up with my garden and two daughters 13 & 8 still living at home. Then I have the added chaos of my married son and daughter-in-law staying with me until their apartment is ready. It is seriously a busy and chaotic life. Then I start thinking it's only summer. School will be back in session soon. We will have meetings, sporting events, plays & programs to attend. I find myself overwhelmed. I really don't notice myself getting overwhelmed until my mood changes. See, I am normally a happy-go-lucky person. Very laid back and goes with the flow of things. But, very OCD when it comes to cleanliness of my home and organization. I then notice I'm being to be short with my children. Having a bad attitude. Then watch them watch on eggshells due to my lack of patience. Then I feel guilty, apologize to my kids and realize this is NOT Godly parenting. This is not even good parenting. My children a gift from God. They are his reward. Entrusted to me for a moment in time. What am I thinking? I have to make a change and soon. God has assigned me glorious task, how do I not loose sight of it?

I stated by buying The Love Dare for parents by Stephen and Alex Kendrick. By just the 3^rd day of dares. I was intrigued. I wanted more as a mother. I knew I needed to be more. I knew I needed to do more. But, where do I start? Here are a few things I have found. Things God has prayerfully shown me and I have incorporated into our home. I will let you know how well they worked in time.

1. Remember, each day is a gift.

Today is gift. A present from God. Designed and custom made for me. All aspects of this day, including the difficulties, challenges and messes are tailored fit for me. It may not be what I've prayed and asked God for. But, exactly what he knows I need. God only gives us what we need. And today I may need, that challenge. That mess. That difficulty! God fills my life daily with so many blessings. Some of these blessings are right there out in the open just like Christmas morning. Some of those other blessings are hidden. In incognito. In disguise. And, those hidden blessings are the blessings that end up being the biggest blessings with the best message.

This doesn’t mean I do not struggle daily. And, that I don't find some days challenging. I just try to remember that these days are designed to help me grow in my faith, in my mothering and homemaking. And yes, I have to make a choice and some days it's an effort to remember this. I try to hold on to “this is the day that the Lord has made, we will rejoice and be glad in it” (Psalm 118:24). I have to actively purse joy.

2. Keep an heavenly perspective.

I am I displaying this? In my mothering and homemaking? I would get caught up in Facebook or other social media sites. I would spend hours upon hours after my regular 8 hour work day editing photos or scheduling photo shoots. Then I decided!!! I deleted my Facebook account completely. I set apart a certain amount of time each day to blog. I no longer use photography as a business. I do favors and volunteer as photographer occasionally. This is something I carefully and prayerfully considered before following through. And, guess what!!! I DO NOT MISS FACEBOOK. I do not miss the hectic schedule of my own business.

 Allowing me more time to focus on the external aspect of mothering and homemaking.  I love the extra time with the girls.

 

“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men” (Col. 3:23).

 This is definitely work. Very valuable work. And, work I could use to bring glory and honor to God. I have to constantly remind myself (no this does not make me a bad, mom). This is all work I can do for Jesus! I have to look past my own selfish ambitions. Like missing my favorite late night drama, the loss of sleep and loss of my own free time (whatever “free” time is).

I have to make the decision to focus on the eternal things. The eternal souls God has carefully entrusted in my hands. Yes, I sometimes wonder what he was thinking. Take hold, purse it, love it, be positive all for the glory of God.

3. Take a time out (often if needed)

When you feel weary and you just need a quick break, (a walk or jog). I choose gardening most of the time. Yes, sometimes stepping back for five minuets will do the trick. This break I know is a simple trick. And, sometimes a much needed one. It will do amazing things for you mental, physical and emotional well-being. While doing this take a deep breath, breathe in the fresh air. Let God's natural elements sweep over you, refreshing you. Sometimes, you need to do this more than once a day. And, that's okay. (I shamefully admit occasionally it's just hiding and eating my favorite candy bar).

4. Develop a purpose for you family/home.

Let's face it. The majority of us do not have some kind of brilliant mission statement for our homes. Most of us do not pray and ask God for a “mission statement” for our family. I know I've never done it. Most of us do not even realize the purpose of our family or home. I know I was seriously clueless.

I had read a blog once where someone challenged me. Someone I didn't know. Someone God had obviously flown in under my radar to speak directly to me. She posted “Where there is no vision, the people perish” (Prov. 29:18). A mission statement will help focus you on the priorities, guide you in making better decisions, and keep your view above the changing tide of circumstances.

Wow, what a huge eye opening statement for someone. Like a lowly single mom. I had to think back over the years of my parenting choices. I had operated recklessly as a mother. I had no vision. As I loved my children, all of them. Give up my life, do anything to help them type love. I wasn't mothering with heart. The heart God intended us to use.  Had I truly focused on my mothering priorities? I hadn't! So, right then and there I decided I was going to do it.

So the beginning of my “mission statement”. What is my mission? What is my purpose in my home?

I thought I prayed nightly God would help me become the mother he created me to be. The one he intended when he intrusted me with these precious little souls. My mission has risen from the following scriptures.

• Then all the people left, each for their own home, and David returned home to bless his family. 1 Chronicles 16:43
• On the twenty-third day of the seventh month he sent the people to their homes, joyful and glad in heart for the good things the Lord had done for David and Solomon and for his people Israel. 2 Chronicles 7:10
• These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.
• Deuteronomy 6:7
  
  
• They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved. Acts 46:46
• Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
  1 Corinthians 13:4-7

These scriptures gave a foundation on which I could build my mission statement. My mission from here on out is........

 “To make my home a place of blessing, joyful a place full of love and learning, training and testifying to the Lord's goodness”.

  End the end falling short of this is a failure for me. And, when it comes to my children failure is not an option. I am not saying that daily I will not fail. I am human. I am imperfect. However, I am created by a perfect God who never fails me. One who will help and guide me. If I'll let him. Help me not fail with the eternal result.

5. Study & Memorize the word of God

As outlined in Proverbs 31. How does one become this mother, friend and wife? How do I make my home the kind of home she made? Is it even possible? Well sorry ladies I am no longer married. So, I do not feel I can elaborate on the wife part of this. How does she laugh without fear of her, the future of child/children? For starters she trust the Lord God with all her heart and soul. She buries her face and heart in the word of God.

It's Proverbs 31:17-31

“She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate

(yes, I skipped verses 1-16. Those verses focus on the wifely duties)

So, in the end. I have learned I am not perfect. I will never be. I can focus on what I have learned and apply it daily. I can pray and ask God to help me rely solely upon him to help me. And, prayerfully trust that he will. I know my attitude/mood has a powerful effect on the atmosphere in my home. I determined if my home houses the peaceful joyful presence of God. Where my children thrive and flourish into the people God has created them to be. Or if I allow it to house a presence of discouragement, a joyless depression, and negativity. It is up to me. I have to conciously make the decision and yes some days the effort. To make my home the home God intended it to be.

Remember God is great & Coffee is your friend,

Hollie Kate

Favorite Almost Never Fail Recipies

Todays blog post will be a little on the lighter side. And, I am not referring to calories. Because these delicious recipes are not recipes you want to count your calories. Unless, you want to turn them into delicious points (tee-he-he). These are recipe's my daughters and I enjoy making together on a regular basis. Especially for holidays and birthdays. They are great gifts. Just fill a little "Chinese take-out container". You can purchase them from the Dollar Tree for a buck.



The first recipe is the almost never fail no bake cookie recipe. The reason we call them almost never fail no bake cookies is...... if it's raining the humidity is extremely high and they don't seem to want to set. Any other time viola easy.

Hollie Kate's No Bakes

 





 

Ingredients:

2 C. sugar

3 Tbsp. of cocoa

1/4 C. butter

1/2 C. milk

1/2 C. peanut butter

2-1/2 C. quick oats**

1 tsp. vanilla

Directions:

1.  In saucepan, bring to a boil: sugar, cocoa, butter, and milk.

2.  After is starts boiling, remove from heat and add: peanut butter, quick oats, and vanilla.  Stir until oats are coated well {about 1 minute}.

3.  Place immediately on wax paper in a size of your choosing to cool.  Yields: about 3 dozen

 

**Warning:  Don't try to substitute regular oats in place of quick oats.  The regular oats will not get cooked and you will essentially be eating raw oats.  This didn't seem to bother my husband, but it did a number on my jaw.  Quick oats are the key to this one!  

 

Memaw's Chocolate Chip Cookies

 

 

 

2 cups all-purpose flour

1 1/2 cups cake flour

1 1/2 teaspoons salt

1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda

1 1/2 cups unsalted butter, softened

1 1/4 cups packed brown sugar

1 cup granulated sugar

4 eggs

1 tablespoon vanilla

2 12 - ounce packages semisweet chocolate pieces (4 cups total)

3 cups chopped pecans or walnuts

Directions

1. In a medium bowl, combine all-purpose flour, cake flour, salt and baking soda. Set aside.
2. In a very large mixing bowl, beat butter with an electric mixer on medium to high speed for 30 seconds. Add brown sugar and granulated sugar. Beat on medium speed until mixture is combined, scraping sides of bowl occasionally. Add eggs one at a time, beating on medium speed after each addition until combined. Beat in vanilla until combined. Beat in as much of the flour mixture as you can with the mixer on low speed. Stir in any remaining flour mixture with a wooden spoon until combined. Stir in chocolate pieces and pecans.
3. Drop dough by rounded tablespoons or by using a rounded #40 ice cream scoop 2 inches apart onto ungreased cookie sheets. Bake in a 375 degree F oven for 9 to 11 minutes or until edges are lightly browned and center is set (may appear underbaked). Remove from oven. Cool on cookie sheets for 1 minute; transfer to wire racks to cool completely. Makes 78 cookies.

 

 

These are our go-to cookies recipe's. We love them both, and think they are equally delicious. They are very easy, and as mentioned before great gifts.  We hope you enjoy some of our favorites. Sending blessings you way.

 

 

Remember God is great and coffee is your friend,

Hollie Kate, Kielee Joy & Madison Faith

 

 

 

Socail Media and Security.....

Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr, Vine, Twitter, LinkedIn, SnapChat, Foursquare, YouTube, Pintrest. I could keep going. There are over one-hundred social sites that catch not only our attention. But the attention of our children as well. They consume our time. For every minute/hour we spend on these sites/apps must be very important and productive. Because, we are exchanging a minute/hour of our life for it.  But this blog today is not about the social media time exchange (that is for a later date).

Today's blog idea came from a Facebook debate between my thirteen year old daughter and myself. One on how fast and far a status and/or photograph will travel via social media in one twenty-four hour period.

 I shared a photo. I asked for you ALL my "friends"  to like and/or share it. In the first 12 hours this photo made it to almost all states (thousands of ...cities) within the USA, Japan, and Germany. Today will hit the 48-Hour mark and it is still going. It has traveled so fast. I've not been able to keep track of how far and fast. There is nothing I can do to stop it. Other than delete my account (the photo will still be out there, just not linkable to me).  In this time frame in just a few clicks someone has access to where I work, go to church, where she attends school, even where I buy groceries or eat. This was even a big eye opener to me!

As parent I allow my children to have accounts to certain social site. I only have a few rules.

1.  I must have the log-on and passwords to all of them. At all times.
2. They were subject to random online searches.
3. They were allotted a particular amount of time on these sites.
4. All pictures and status must reflect a uplifting Christian attitude and modesty
5. All safety features must be in place at all times. No, public posting. All must be accessible by friends, ONLY!

Very sweet short and simple rules to follow. However, breaking any of these rules would result in deactivation of the account. The time of account deactivation was dependent on the severity of the infraction. I thought I was being a safe mom. A good mom. I was protecting my children. Little did I truly understand about social media.

For starters when you have the location on for GPS purposes on your smart phone. These apps post your location even if you are unaware of it. Even when you a strict privacy settings in place if a "friend" likes a status, photo, check-in, etc.... It posts to their wall that they liked it. If they share it or you tag them in it, everyone can "see" it. Not to mention the infamous #hashtag. At this point it is no longer private at all. And little did I know your lap top comes with a location feature. This is turned on by you the very first time you start-up the lap top and set it up. (no not all of the lap tops have this feature). Therefore no matter how strict your privacy filter is, you are potentially allowing the whole world access to yours and/or your children's social media sites.

Before I challenge you I want to make it clear. I DO NOT think of it as bad parenting. Nor, am I calling you a bad parent if you allow your child/children to have these accounts. I think each family is unique and each family does things in their own way. And, what I am doing is what I think uniquely fits our family.

So, my challenge to you today as a parent, guardian,  friend, aunt, uncle, grandparent etc...... Is how far are you will to let it go before you do something to protect your loved one. From predators and pedophiles, that seek out these children online. First watch the following video at www.takethislollipop.com
It will ask to access your Facebook page. If you chose to let your children watch. I suggest you do it one at a time. For the effect it must be logged into each account.

 

*Remember, safety is our first priority*

 

If you do this please give me feed back on what you think. I would appreciate all the feed back, I can get.

 

Thank you all for stopping by and reading, today's blog.

Remember God is great and coffee is your friend,

Blessings Hollie Kate.