The Chaos in Christmas

 

I love Christmas time. The temperatures, the lights, the smells (oh.... the smells), the tree and even the family gatherings. I love the simplicity of the season. Yes! The simplicity. I know and have met so many people who complain. They are so exhausted mentally, emotionally, physically, financially and spiritually. Why? The Christmas season!!! I've never understood this.

Christmas was never meant to exhaust us in any way. It was never meant to make us stress; especially about finances.

We spend so much time trying to figure out who and what to buy for whom. We're out-doing what we bought last year. For some, it's out-doing the other side of the family, In-laws and the other parents. Fighting parking lots, patrons in stores and long check out lines. We then worry about our overdrawn bank accounts, drained savings and maxed out credit cards. Now, how does this contribute to the reason for the season? You're right! It doesn’t!! Not even in the slightest!

Anything that causes us stress, chaos and discontentment is not of God. It is not of anything godly. Satan works hard. He works very hard to rear his ugly face in any and all aspects of life. Every stinking day of the year. He is not confined to a certain time of year. He is not confined to a certain season. That's right.... He will in any way he can distract you from the true meaning of the season. This is when we lose focus. This is when we STRESS OUT!

But...... Let me tell you! It does not have to be this way!!!!!!!

Christmas is not about the presents. It's about the Presence! The presence of family. The presence of Love and most importantly the presence of GOD!!

I challenge you today, tomorrow and all Christmas Season. Stay focused on the reason for the season. The birth of Christ... As in Isaiah 9:6

“For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.”

(image borrowed)

Here are a few ways to help with teaching our children and ourselves (including me):

Teach our children why we celebrate the season as in Isaiah....

• Buy less..... My children will get one gift and stocking suffers. And, these are purchased at the after Christmas sales. (yes, I'm that Mom!!).
• Don't be afraid to give hand crafted heart felt gifts. (People love them)
• Make a bigger deal out of their birthdays
• Take the focus off the giving of gifts. Give to others. (make a Christmas meal & deleiver to a family who may not have Christmas dinner without it)
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• Volunteer on Christmas morning. (Salvation Army, Jesus House, Homeless Shelters, Soup Kitchens)
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• Use the money to purchase and pass out coats, gloves, scarfs, shoes, sandwiches, soups to the homeless. 

I pray this will help you as much as it helped me while writing it. Christmas is a wonderful spiritual time of year. That all started with the birth of a baby. Who was born to die. To suffer and die for our salvation.

Blessings,

Hollie Kate

 

 

 

 

I'm DONE, Stressed out single parenting!

 

I was raised in church. I was raised to love, trust and depend upon God and his timing. I memorized all the scriptures on trust and worry in primary Sunday school. I have been a single mother since 2005. There are days it seems like yesterday, then there are those days where is seems like a million years ago. I know being a parent there are worries too numerous to count. I think as a single parent those worries double sometime possible triple. I know for me some of my worries were brought on myself. Other times those worries were circumstantial. Naturally we worry am I doing enough as a single parent to raise successful, healthy, Godly, thriving adults who will be able to function in society. Or am I raising another statistic? Will he or she end up in a clock tower going postal? Single mothers and fathers naturally worry more than average, this is normal I promise. You are not alone. I am not alone. It is a hard lesson to learn.

When I say some of those worries were brought on by myself. I am referring to the times I was too strong, too independent and too smart to admit I needed help. Bottom line it was not independence, it was not because I was strong. And defiantly not because I was smart. It was because I was prideful, huge Mistake!!! Proverbs 16:18 says “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” (NIV).  I can and I think we all can admit at some point in time. It is hard to admit I need help. I can’t do this by myself.  I cannot emotionally, mentally, physically or financially handle this by myself. Were taught by society this omission is a sign of weakness. Well it is not, it is a hard lesson to learn.

One of my favorite things women would say is “the lord is your husband, he is the father of your children”. I distinctly remember thinking lady are you nuts, who hit you upside your head?! I could never wrap my head nor my heart around this concept. Most of these women had never been a single parent. Yet, they wanted to tell me how I should look at my situation.  How I should feel. I truly believed these women were nuts. I know these sweet women were taking the following scriptures and applying them to my situation.

“For your Maker is your husband-- the LORD Almighty is his name-- the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth.” Isaiah 54:5 (NIV).  “A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling.” Psalm 68:5 (NIV).

They didn’t mean in a physical sense. Let’s face it God doesn’t sit on the couch cuddling and watching a movie with you. He doesn’t send you flowers or chocolates at work. He doesn’t text or call you midafternoon just to say “I love you”.  I remember thinking “Ok lady, next I get lonely and want to go on a date, I’ll pray about it.” I would be so aggravated at these women.  I used the phrase “when you walk a mile in my shoes, then give me call.” This hateful response didn’t get me anywhere. Yes at the time it made me temporarily feel better. I would feel so desperate at times I would think surely I am obviously one of Job’s decedents. The Satan has skipped a few generations and I am being tested. Then when reading Job right there in black and white it was printed in Job 2:10, He replied, "You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?" Talk about a slap in the face. It wasn’t a physical slap but it sure felt like it.  I learned what these women meant. Was not that God would be my physical husband or a physical father to my children.  That in these times if I were to call upon the Lord he would give me peace, comfort and decrease my anxiety and worry in only a way he could.

 When we really pray it doesn’t have to be a loud prayer for all to hear or see. It only has to be a genuine heart felt prayer. I mean there are still days when a loud boisterous prayer is needed. You now those days you’re standing in the kitchen kids are fighting, you’re sick the dog has had accidents. You are really not sure what you have to cook for dinner.  The youngest has just announced she has no clean clothes for tomorrow. You have no laundry money and realize you will be scrubbing them in the sink. Yes, these are the days I am very vocal with my heavenly father. A simple “Jesus, I cannot do this without your help” will work (heartfelt of course). Never let anyone else dictate your prayer life. It’s a conversation between you and God. Simple as that. In 2 Chronicles 15:4, it states “But in their distress they turned to the LORD, the God of Israel, and sought him, and he was found by them”.  And when you don’t know what to pray just say his name “Jesus.” Matthew 18:19, Says "Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven."  Ask your pastor, friend or even children to pray with you. I promise it works.

My point today is don’t let your pride get in the way of the help God can provide. Yes, sometimes it comes in the form of family, friends and strangers. I’ve made several life friends from accepting the help God has sent my way. Don’t be afraid, prideful or worry about sharing your situation. You never know when your story, your journey, your testimony will help someone else. I pray today you are blessed. That God reveals himself in a mighty way through your situation. Remember this too shall pass. There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: Ecclesiastes 3:1.

 

Remember life is short, God is good and coffee is your friend,

 

Hollie Kate.